By Dr. Judy Kuriansky. 2002.
Table of Contents
Part One: The signs of a healthy relationship in the new millennium
1. What makes a relationship healthy?
2. The seventh dimension of a healthy relationship: Spiritual love
3. The eighth dimension of a healthy relationship: Digital duos in cyber love
4. Is it true love?
5. So, you’re a couple–but are you friends?
6. The importance of matching your love styles
Part Two: Secrets of a healthy and lasting relationship
7. A healthy self first
8. Are we compatible?
9. Cooperation –Whose team are you on?
10. Communication –Can we talk?
11. Commitment–Warming up cold feet
Part Three: How to keep the passion alive
12. Making the honeymoon last
13. Resurrecting romance
14. The art of seduction
15. How important is sex?
16. What’s healthy sex for couples?
17. Keeping the sex fires burning
Part Four: Obstacles to a lasting relationship
18. Preventing love burnout
19. Ghost-busting your relationship
20. Dollars and sense: A healthy couple’s guide to handling money issues
21. Working nine to……With time off for love
22. Offering constructive criticism
23. Timeout on fighting
24. Affairs: how to stay after one of you strays
25. Dealing with crises as a couple
26. It’s not just the two of us
Part Five: Where do we go from here?
27. S/he’s the one for me!
28. Keeping your love exciting with new-millennium body and mind techniques
29. Helping each other toward a healthier relationship
Chapter 5: So, You’re A Couple–But Are You Friends?
Not only can lovers be friends, but lovers should be friends. If not, they might share intense passion and physical attraction, but have no friendship to carry them through the rest of the relationship. Above and beyond a sexual partner, you need a friend. A true friend is a confidant, a person who will be there for you in an emergency, to share your experiences, and to play out all the roles that a healthy relationship requires, like being a sounding board, or support system, a workout partner, or travel companion, a buddy through thick and thin.
Sure, romantic love is a wonderful thing. And sexual chemistry is electric. But friendship is the solid foundation that keeps the relationship together, even when romantic love and sexual attraction aren’t at their peaks (and they won’t always be). Friendship is what will pull you through, not only when your sex drive is on hiatus, but also when your baby is bawling all night, when your in-laws come to visit for a month, or when your company is downsizing and you are afraid of losing your job. At these times, you realize the value of a friend. True friendship is crucial if love is going to last.
Chapter 8: Are We Compatible?
The 12 major areas of compatibility:
1. Physicality
2. Intellect
3. Emotions
4. Finances
5. Individuality/independence
6. Spirituality
7. Work
8. Sociability
9. Communication
10. Sex
11. Life habits
12. Family